The truth is painful but must be spoken nonetheless. I’ve heard some complaints from some friends plus some of my past experiences.
Ladies, if you don’t have plans for a guy stop the following:
1. Stop calling him “sweet names” like dearie, sweetheart, honey, love etc.
We know you’re a “lovie duvie” but please, control it…don’t give him false hope. Let friends be friends NOT lovers. Unless you want to switch over, then you open up.
2. Stop visiting him on skimpy clothes and buttoned shirts
You visit a guy whose ear NL has filled with topics like ‘How ladies behave when they want to get laid”. If you don’t have plans for him, quit sending those signals. Remember: To every sequence, there is a consequence.
3. Stop getting jealous when you see him with other girls
You don’t want to marry him, yet you get jealous when he’s making headway, relationship-wise. You’re not his mother, biko. Friends sef have limits.
4. Stop discussing your past relationships with him- it’s not his business
This thing you are saying is communicating something different to his mind. You want to talk with someone, you have besties right? False hope everywhere! Now, what do you want him to do? Leave his girl and come solve your relationship problems?
5. Stop visiting him at odd or questionable hours
This is one major way smart and decent girls nicely wipe the thought away from the mind of numerous suitors. If you don’t want intimacy, don’t visit him at all sef. Not like all guys are like that, but MOST girls are like that. A girl visits you and choose to be a good boy, then she hates you.
6. Don’t suggest sleeping in his house or vice versa because something might happen
This offers a protective measure. Don’t get me wrong: if there’s an understanding, it’s okay. More often than not, in a corrupt world of ours, no one can be trusted in a cold bed. You can trust him but can you trust his “down there”. If you don’t want “harassment”, avoid stuff like this.
7. Don’t “miss” him
Ever woke up in the morning and you see a text message in your phone by “just a friend’ saying ‘I miss you’. That stirs up questions as much as it does hormones. It’s risky.
8. Stop ‘breasting’ him
You don’t have plans for him and you’ll be staining his white clean shirt with your b**bs. C’mon! That’s unfair! Some will just come with their coconut and rest on your body as if your skin cells are dead and gone. Let’s change in 2016.