Wondering whether you should dump your friend or not? Read this to know what is unacceptable in any friendship.
Just like any romantic relationship, unfortunately, even platonic ones or a friendship can eventually run its course due to certain circumstances and situations. Many people tend to underestimate the negative impact that a friendship can have on your life when things start going sour. Popular culture and terms like ‘bestfriends for life or BFFs’ tell us how friendships are supposed to last for several years on end.
However, in reality, life is rarely that rosy. Though a friendship can add a lot of value to your life, it can also be stressful and draining if your friend turns out to be a toxic person. These are the six signs that indicate that it is time to break-up with your ‘friend’.
1. They constantly attack your insecurities, directly or indirectly
If you’ve trusted your friend enough to reveal what you’re most insecure about and they constantly bring it up and make you feel bad about it, don’t even think twice before breaking up with them. Playful banter and harmless jokes are one thing, but if they try to make you feel bad about your appearance or certain personality traits that they know you’re conscious about, they’re not really your friend to begin with.
2. They repeatedly refuse to acknowledge the fact that they’ve hurt you
Unfortunately, in every relationship, there will be a time when either party hurts the other. In many cases, it could be completely unintentional and by communicating with your friend, you can get rid of any misunderstandings and tell them how you really felt about it. This helps in moving on from the incident and even growing closer to your friend. However, if they repeatedly refuse to listen to you and brush it off as you being ‘too sensitive’, it is a sign that you should break-up with them.
3. They have betrayed your trust
Most of us have been in a situation where you trust your friend enough to reveal a secret only to find out that they betrayed you by talking about it with others. Or they end up dating someone you were interested in. Such incidents can make it very difficult for you to start trusting your friend again. Depending on the situation, if you feel the betrayal was so bad that you could never trust them again, then breaking up with them is a good idea.
4. Both of you have been growing apart
This is more common with people who have known each other since their school days. Unfortunately, people tend to change a lot over the years. If you feel you and your friend don’t connect anymore due to different interests and perspectives and like you’re just drifting apart from them, it means the friendship is just running its natural course.
In this case, you don’t need to necessarily have ‘The Talk’ with them and break-up, especially if both of you are on the same page about the friendship. Instead, just take some time off and try meeting new people with similar interests. If you’re lucky, after a few months or even years, both of you will click again.
5. You are the only one making all the effort
Do you constantly feel like you’re the only one making all the effort to initiate contact with them and stay in touch? The signs could be that they are constantly rescheduling meetings, don’t bother calling or messaging and have repeatedly ditched you on several occasions without a proper apology. Also, most of the conversations you have with them are extremely one-sided and they don’t really bother listening to you. A friendship is supposed to be about give and take and if they’re not adding any value to your life, you should break-up with them.
6. There’s too much jealousy and unhealthy competition
While there’s nothing wrong with healthy competition with a friend, especially if they’re working in the same field as you, the minute the ‘friendship’ is all about them doing far better than you, it is not a good sign. Your friend is supposed to be happy for you and your accomplishments, not bitter and jealous when they hear about your new relationship, job or promotion. If they can’t be supportive and encouraging, ask yourself, are they really your friends?